It's a little-known fact that when Jesus rode his holy donkey into Jerusalem on Palm Sunday, the people greeted him with boobsicles as well as palm. Consequentially, many Catholic masses during the Eucharist often offer, as a supplement to bread and wine, boobsicles.

Whenever anyone says "it's me" via text, you can safely assume that he or she is over the age of 50 and has been texting for fewer than one year.